| Are You Confident Enough? |
| by Shan Rees Do you feel 100% happy with who you are and how you come across? Do you feel confident to be yourself in any company? Do you value your ideas and opinions regardless of whether they are in line with those of friends and acquaintances? If you answer no to any of the above, read on! Why do so many people lack confidence and feel low, or less than 100% high, in self-esteem? Is it their fault? If you are one of those people, is there anything you can do about it? Most often, a contributing factor to low self-esteem is the fact that the person did not receive much/any encouragement or appreciation whilst growing up; perhaps they heard negative messages from parents, teachers or other influential figures in their life when young. If this was your experience, you may find that you have taken on board these negative messages and now say them to yourself! You may have noticed that this does not enhance your life. I’m talking about messages such as ‘I’m so stupid’ or ‘I’m hopeless.’ So, whilst it’s not ‘your fault’ exactly, I‘d say it is your responsibility how you behave now; and, most certainly, it’s up to you what you tell yourself, don’t you agree? So the good news is that, yes, of course there is something you can do about it. You can learn to value yourself and treat yourself as your own best friend. Believe me, if you take even small steps towards this, your life will change for the better. Confidence Boosters 1. Prepare some positive messages which you commit to saying to yourself regularly. This could be reversing the negative message e.g. I’m very intelligent’ or it could be simply a lovely, juicy validation like ‘I love and accept myself exactly as I am.’ These are sometimes called affirmations. Don’t necessarily expect to feel comfortable when you say these or write them down; it’s good if you don’t, as that means you are expanding your comfort zone. 2. At the end of each day, commit to noticing things you’ve done well, from arriving somewhere on time to completing a project. Congratulate yourself. Write a list, and, at the end of the week, read it to yourself – a good confidence-booster. 3. Ask yourself what is important to you; beit walking in the country, feeling happy, being around positive people. Have the courage to tell yourself the truth about this. At the core of everything you enjoy doing, you will find a value - something like Happiness, Fulfilment, Positivity, Honesty. List your main values, pick one to start with and commit to making sure you have enough of this in your life. It’s up to you! So those are some ideas. Notice that, within each suggestion, I include the word ‘commit.’ It might be useful to ask yourself to what extent you are willing to be committed to your own life ----- For further ideas and help, visit http://www.livingexcellently.co.uk Or email Shan at shan@livingexcellently.co.uk |
| Posted: 03/10/2010 21:06:17 Last Updated: 03/10/2010 21:08:36 |
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